on mountain tops.October 26, 2015
We went on an adventure yesterday. When it first began, we had no destination in mind, but we found the top of the world. The road that took us there wound in and out of towering pines, lovely powdery red hillsides, and dared the edge of steep cliffs that dropped off into non-existence. We kept the windows down, even though the chill of the outside air numbed our fingers and the tips of our noses. The scent of autumn tickled our senses and ignited a spectacular excitement within us.
It's an interesting experience to stand on top of the world and look out over all that once seemed so big-- because in that instant, big things seemed small and small things seemed smaller. Everything we've come to know in our short existence suddenly seemed so unimportant. Lately I've been stressing over little life decisions such as what major to go into, where to live, what to do, how to earn money... but when I stood there, up on the tippity-tip-top of some mountain, all that really mattered was the man that stood beside me and the family we left up in Utah County. Perspective is a magical thing that has the magical power to change the way we think. And mountain tops always seem to bring out the very best in me.
Halloween is my favorite holiday, but with everything that's been going on lately I haven't even had the chance to decorate yet. Life slips by so quietly; so quickly. Half the time I don't even realize it has passed until someone tells me "happy birthday" and I see all those candles on the cake and don't remember how there came to be so many. I have this theory that life seems to pass faster the older you get because a year, in comparison to the years you've lived, grows smaller and smaller and smaller. When I was a little girl I remember that summer used to last for centuries-- but now it's only a few months out of the year. That's because, to a five-year-old girl, a couple months is a good-sized fraction of her lifespan. But to a twenty-year-old girl, in comparison to the years of life she has tucked in her back pocket, it suddenly is naught but a couple of months when the sun shines bright and you've got too much to do. It ends so quickly.
I want to slow down time, though. I want to fill moments with magic and keep them forever. I want to love, and dance, and sing, and live so brightly that each night, when I collapse upon my bed and my head hits the cool side of the pillow, I can smile and say, "Today was the best day of my life." That's my new goal. I'm not quite sure how to accomplish it yet, but I've got a lifetime to figure it out.